Tuesday, July 24, 2007

At last......

It has been raining lately....so much rain...over the weekend...love the smell of rain in the morning...especially if u don have to rush of to work :) love the rain...

stayed at home completely for 2 days i was off...played audi most of time ;)...and rested.. this was one the best weekends i have had in a long time...

rain...means so many things in life...for the sad..it means the world is crying with you...for the happy..it means there's going to be better times after it goes away.. for me...i juz wish to look at it..the same i used to when i was little girl...the rain would be my company...my avid listener...would know how i felt at tat time..and even with all the things tat i have gone through in life..it has always been there for me...

the fact is..i suddenly feel that i have no one to turn to when i need to talk...when i needed to scream out loud.. to share my feelings..im so alone at times >_<".. i suppose someone's trying to tell me to wake up and be independant..why think negatively...i know that the way its suppose to be..but i am only human..and its not an excuse ok ( u knw who u are -.-)

hehe..its almost 3am now..and although im yawning alot.. cant find myself going to sleep..mostly because i had food poisoning today -.- and god knows how many times i ran to the toilet ><... gonna take mc tomorrow :P juz don feel like working...juz very very tired...

my plans for tomorrow? dono yet..lolss..see hao bah^^

Fav song lyrics for the moment? "One Last Cry by Brian Mcknight"

My shattered dreams and broken heart
Are mending on the shelf
I saw you holding hands, standing close to someone else
Now I sit all alone wishing all my feeling was gone
I gave my best to you, nothing for me to do
But have one last cry

One last cry, before I leave it all behind
I've gotta put you outta my mind this time
Stop living a lie

I guess I'm down to my last cry
I was here, you were there
Guess we never could agree
While the sun shines on you
I need some love to rain on me
Still I sit all alone, wishing all my feeling was gone
Gotta get over you, nothing for me to do
But have one last cry

Repeat Chorus

I know I gotta be strong
Cause round me life goes on and on and on
And on.....
I'm gonna dry my eyes
Right after I had my
One last cry

Repeat Chorus

I guess I'm down
I guess I'm down
I guess I'm down...
To my last cry...

Hehe..have a great week ahead peeps^^ <3333 & muackss...

Friday, July 20, 2007


i refuse to be treated like one of them,
i refuse to be like one of them,
think like them,
act like them,
do the things they do,
that will never be me,
i am who i am,
and i am not them,
if i am silent..it does not mean i am dumb,
if i am laughing..it does not mean i am happy,
my heart is soft..that much i know,
but it has never been weak,
it has always been strong to care,
to always be there,
to take in sorrows,
love me for who i am,
spare me a thought when you far from me,
and that will be enough,
my shoulder will be here to be cried on,
my arms will always be open wide,
to take you in if you ever need it,

but always remember i am not them...

Monday, July 16, 2007


As i walked out of my office today...the sunlight n smell of fresh had made me smile for the 1st time today..i was suddenly more calm and relaxed..not because of work..but of something else..

And as i walked to my car..i tot of the day tat had passed.. the truth is for the entire day i had been spacing in and out of conciousness..even when my frens spoke to me..i could not reply them and juz stared blankly at them as if i couldnt think of wat to say at all...

What happened u ask..? The thing is..a recent conversation wif a good fren n me suddenly realised wat they had told me...i couldnt understand it then but all of a sudden i knew wat they juz said...though i had hoped tat i understood them wrongly..the problem is..i think im certain of wat it is....

I suddenly felt utter disappointment towards them...and as the words kept repeating in my mind..i felt worse and wanted to tell them how i felt...and so i wrote a mail saying how i tot abt the incident...the mail is still in my draft box...i will delete it..

I realised all i needed was to let it out..

It was not my choice to be made and tat being the case i shall not judge...it they can live wit it and felt that they did no wrong..i shd too..im sorry tat im dissapointed..will take me some time to forget it but i shall not say wat they shd or shd not do...it is not my life to live...i have nvr ever given up on ppl..and nvr will..maybe it juz made me think abt stuff..

Life shd nvr be abt regrets..and even when you feel the whole world is against you...its almost certainly not...juz u against urself..even if u die tomorrow..think of wat u have done today and the days before...will u leave in regret...? We can nvr change the choices we have made...there's no take 2 in life..

I do not regret knowing you...and nvr will...ure still as close and dear to me as u ever were my dear fren...remember that..

"...do not say ure sorry unless u really mean it..."

Wednesday, July 11, 2007

Days like this.....

...are suppossed to be spent in bed..reading a good book and nice cup o coffee by ur table..alas tis is not a perfect world..we are living in a screwed up world whr we work for the money...but then...

im not complaining..juz stating facts^^...i love my days :) and although it seems sucky at times and i hate my boss :P still trying to forget abt the darker side of things and look at happier stuff..

and even now..as i sit here..and having no clue wat im blogging coz my mind so dead from the work that i do everyday and god knows how many brain cells i have killed today and might look in horror of the things i have written down tonite *takes deep breath* i still love it~

we are all human..we have our "stuff", our priorities in life...and even when there seems to be no other way..there is always one..we juz have to look in the rite direction..life will nvr be wat u want it to be.. its up to you to make things happen..u have to fight for ur dreams..always..

"..life is as ordinary as u make it out to be...with a little bit of love, hope, care, passion and ur heart will make it extra ordinary..."

Dam tired ler..will blog soon.. i promise^^.. <333 muakssssss^^

Tuesday, July 10, 2007

an addition to MIA.....

psps..i forgot to add in this interesting quiz that a fren sent^^...the results a bit..hmmm..i mean ppl do confide in me..but angel of guidance?? LMAOs...oh well...lamer do things without reason de :P... go try it out ba..

You scored as Angel of Guidance, You were the Angel of Guidance! Before you were sent down to Earth to be tested and be a human, you used to guide people in the right direction when they faced a problem or a seemingly hopeless situation. You looked out for humans using the stars as your eyes during the night when it was dark. Even today as a human, your friends and family often ask you for advice and always trust you because you know what is right and lead everyone in the right direction.

Angel of Guidance


Angel of Hope


Guardian Angel


Angel of Prayer


Angel of Good Fortune


Angel of Death


What kind of an Angel were you before your life on Earth? (kool anime pics)
created with QuizFarm.com


Hehe..miss me mar? :P

Haiz..ps la..lazy to blog abit..added to my no idea wat to blog = no blogging at all =x...

Work load has been horrible these past weeks..eyes are constantly dry and tired (where's my eyemo!!) so less aud'ing abit lo..nvr MIA lei..its u guys dont play^^.. Yes im still at the same place..nvr hand resignation..bla bla..but be informed.. due to some incidences at work..the impending resignation will be followed through..believe u me..long story tat is..and not in the mood to expose the incidents tat have occured..

Been watching movies again lately..its fun :P...there are some movies which i would like to watch again^^...*pouts* I WAN WATCH MOVIE!!! =X=X (being a lame shyt^^)

Had a nice weekend..it rained and slept in most of the time..slept until like 2+ in the afternoon on sat o.O..long time nvr do le..mum say 1 weeks rest all accumulate on sat then oni use...lols..yaya =x

The other reason din play so much also was because babe was away..T_T.. but lucky got souveniers for me :P and my demisoda!! (give me >.<)... but... to say i din play much is really an understatement... hurhurXD ;)

Omg..distracted by my mum's taiwanese serial..the type u see then can vomit blood de >< *vomits* ... dam irritating...why good guys so dam stupid de!!! walao bth..somemore its those old time serials (like chinese dynasty stories)...

O? writers block le so fast..i blame the serial..u all can also^^.. audi patching today..so ima got nothin to do :P...sleep? watch serial and be irritated? sit in front comp mindlessly? wah..list is endless of wat i can do tonite..lmao~

Okie..i shall go bath now and decide wat i shall do later..muacksssss^^