Sunday, August 31, 2008

Post Merdeka Day...

Come and gone...feels the same though..hmmm..

Woke up quite late today, uber tired from ytd lolz..

3.30pm - went out shopping with sis for awhile at Prangin Mall, bought some work clothes, super cheap and lots of discounts lor hahaha =x then also manage to get my Body Shop perfume after like so long zzzz, its either i forget or well i forget =x..but got it today woots! :P

7.30pm - reached home but mum wanted to go out @_@..went out to buy groceries lo...wonder wat they will do when i actually leave lol..

Finally made it home at 9plus..wa leg wan break d TT...

Oh yea, went in audi for a starting to like beat up d hahaz..after ytd's comp, been starting to play abit lolz..and guess wat im gettin better! and im playin 8k lo..lvl 2 can get quite decent score liao..and less than 100 miss hahaha..its good d compared to 500+ misses earlier @@..tried the comp song (3254 lvl 3) and gt 300+k niceee hehe..the day b4 prac wit vara also get 150 nia...heh im cool rite? ^^ :P

Enuf crapping liao..need to go pack, tomoro is gonna be busy day d xD

See u guys when i get back <333

Saturday, August 30, 2008

What i did today....Pre-Merdeka Day

Was out extremely early today, woke ard 8.30 (on a SAT!!!), well actually rolled ard thinking if i shd i go back to sleep =x but i promised Vara and well he said he needed moral support (and my headphone -.-||) so got up lor..

Now where did i need to go so early in the morning? AudiSea's Malaysian Clubber Of the Year was held at Netcity Penang and the event was suppose to start at 10am (suppose ok?) Due to the number of players, they delayed it a bit (1hr zz)and ended up with 9 player heh..last one came quite late guess wat..they skipped the 1st 2 songs and str8 did Dance Flower Db4 and FINALS liao! ahhahahahaha..Beat Up mode..3254 techno..erk..not that i have anything against BU but hmm cant play more than 2 rds @_@..

Well, in the end, winners were Keichisan, roosh and Corralus lolzz..Vara ar, he was the one said no need practice BU de..haha=x..since it was early, the gang decided to join Maplesea's Monster Carnival (1000 cash leh for 1st) so juz joined for the heck of it..walao waited like siao..supposed to start at 12.30 ended up starting 3.30..played audi also falling asleep on kb liao lolzz..but we can play for free so continued playin lor...Maple ended fast, all of us was out by 1st rd hahaha..decided then we were all too old for games liao=x or were we? We were actually beaten by a grp of middle age players who plays the entire day, wat a bunch of no lifers:P they are the new generation players now lmaozzz..then Cabal players were coming in for their comp, saw some ppl, ppl i din want to see zzz, and well left str8 coz it was getting quite late and we were scared it was gonna jam up..din even see the maple results,think we knw who the winners will be :P

Well didnt leave empty handed, gt some hampers haha..

One of the stuff we gt, there were also keychains, hp accs, posters etc etc..some were actually stolen by sis n bro -.-" erm don mind the ciggy box, its not mine k? Vara de zzz..

Well came home, went out again wif family, and spent some quiet time wif family, came home and now enjoying the peace n quiet lolzz..

Anyway, HAPPY MERDEKA DAY!! Hope u all have a great hols =)

P/s: Tot of this whole blog while in the shower, came out and finish typin this under 5 mins, cool huh (rushing to go sleep lar...tired @_@)think im addicted to bloggin,hmmm...


Nites peeps <33

Friday, August 29, 2008

Have u ever..

..lose someone so close n dear to you?

I have and ive lost so many over the hurts when u think back but memories keep them alive in me =)

I dont think anyone will understand how i feel unless you've lost someone you love so much leave you forever...

A friend, someone who listens, who loves you no matter what, who is always there when u fall and gets ur back everytime, someone who knows ur in pain though you say ur not...<33

"Always say I Love You to the people you care about while you can, coz you'll never know when you'll lose them..."

P/s: Miss u granpa, u were always the father i never had and though our time was short together, i will always remember you, and no i will never say bye bye..

This song is for you....=)


Developed a suspicious rash on both my wrists.. and its been there 2 days now..

Really annoying me and really itchy and it hurts lo =(

Think im dying soon...sigh..


Useless to say anything anymore, hopeless,

Tired and exasperation is all i ever feel,

My invisibility will be with me always..i need to accept that now..

To think that it would be better to voice what i felt, how silly was i?

Who cares what i think? No one thats who..not even the people closest to me..



P/s: Thx mango-chan for giving me 10mins of ur time to listen and to make me forget..that was all i needed from anyone =)

Thursday, August 28, 2008

Another day, another post...

Slept late, woke early x.x...

Forgot that i had to wake extra early today..had to drop sis to town..was drowsy the entire way lolzz..

My emotions had been erratic today, well, its always erratic lol..happy in the morning, pissed in the afternoon then super happy at nite..i have major problems..Wat? don judge me pls! thats for me to do..bleh~

Like the crown on my head? Like like?? ahahahah=x its only there if the guild buys the channel and we play there :P

Oh well..enuf of the lame stuff=x Its gonna be our countrys' birthday soon oh...51 years of independence, cool huh? More cooler thing would be...NO WORK! lalalalala~ oh my..theres the working spirit =x Not really sure what ill be doing then, but most probably? at home lolz..don like crowds bleh bleh..

My best Independence Day was spent in KL abt 5 years back..had a concert there and stayed on for the was my first time celebrating in KL and it was fun fun fun! :P.. Bukit Bintang was packed like crazy and me n my friend were club hopping, hotel hopping, concert hopping ^^..since alot of of my frens were musicians(incl me :P) we went to the coolest places hah...drank like no one's business from exp red wine to juz kampai lolzz..can u believe one of my frens actually gt drunk from it? -.-" had to drag her back to the hotel coz she couldnt even stand straight lol..

Well, lets see how my celebrations will be for this year ya? =D All i knw for sure is that i wont be in Penang after will update on how i spent Merdeka Days when i get back xP!

Gotta sleep..sweet dreams <3333

Wednesday, August 27, 2008


Ok,a quickie post..

Though it was a holiday, don really knw wat i did and time passed so bladi fast x.x..slept like 5+ the nite before and gt woken up at 10 by a phone call..couldnt fall back asleep after that so juz sat ard n watched astro lolzz..

Before i knew it, it was afternoon d..wat did i do ar? other than sit in front of tv? ermmm...nothing? doink..edited some pics..fiddled ard with some photoshop stuff..after a few dc's decided to try go into audi..patch! i din knw gt patch also..tot suppose to be tomoro..hmmm..anywayyyyy...

Few new features, changed outlook abit, few new audi songs (korean songs this time ard), few new modes (club dance 2, fam battle)..oh yes, an advice..don patch as u normally would, some problems i heard..i tried a few times n hung half way -.-..went into the audi webby and into their notice page..they posted the fixed patcher..install tat and voila! ur in~

Alot of RS (my guild) members were on..they bought channel 7 and i went there to find them( still dono why buyin a channel does for the guild, extra fam points? they dono either x.x) wanted to try out club dance 2, it was cute! abit laggy though cox of the cool map and cuteee dance moves =D something like ballroom but much cuter! haha..din get it first few rds, but Dek tot us step by step and it was quite fun lor..hehe..more interactive..u can actually see each guy perform 1st (they call it PR time haha) and then grade f1= like , f2=normal, f3= don like (i think, nvr used lolz)and same goes for guys..very cute :P better than the original club dance haha..

Then guild wanted to try FAM battle..3 from each guild..winner get FAM point and losers get points deducted..therefore the need to accumulate points..dono if individuals can do that bor, or need the guild member to be together.. played with quite a few pro guilds lor..won some lose some..lols..

Oh well..that was that..did i mention we can tick attendance now? not that it matters..coz i don go in that often anyway..haha..other than that it was a lonely afternoon..sigh =(

Did this also..

Photographed n edited by me - the house guard dog? not really baby more like it :P

Kays need to sleep le..darn tired and tomoro is a long day..

Nitesss <333

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

Its 2.30am...

...and im here bloggin. Why? Coz i can :P

Its a public holiday tomoro^^ not a compulsory one but one im entitled to =D..think i heard that tomoro is voting day for permatang pauh (najib n anwar?) im not good with politics..erm..actually i dont really give a dam =x..i shd but..hmm..dont judge me! =s

Oh ya..found out something babe..the stuff we get the jumbo box(HS5)? I found out that if we get the opposite sex stuff we can actually send it to i can actually send u the guys stuff i get! but i deleted some ady wor=x no worries..those stuff were quite gay :P...i kept the nice stuff =D..found this out when i was going through my closet in my House..can click male and female on the top de o.O..dumbasses..wanted to sms n tell u but heh abit late hor..and i scared i forget put it here =x=x.. ok back to my life..

Its a holiday tomoro!! =DDDD

Fiddled ard with Facebook abit (juz registered lolz) and think will probably forget abt it in a week or two hahaha..juz somethin new for me to look at..i mean i will go on n see see..but thats all ill do^^ maybe ill be interested in it longer? who knows..:P

Wei!!! i really need to take out my pics from my phone lar..why is it not working (*&^%$#@..geram to take it out??? T_T dam it..

Really want to change my blog background..need some help..Help~ pls?~ bla.. will figure it project for tomoro =)

Oh yeah...ano's new hair..nice? its cute but i still like the other one better..but expire d T_T

Ok..back to fiddlin with my pics and try to make a new background for mi blog :P


Monday, August 25, 2008

Yay for me! =D

Finally handed in my last assignment online at 10pm..Woots..hehe..ima freeeeeee

Well for now i am xDDD..

Slept abt 3 hrs last nite and had classes through the afternoon..came home with wobbly feet x.x..thank god its over..thank u thank u thank u =x Well i only have to go to classes once a its alright..heh..

Been really moody..mainly coz my family..inspite of me trying to finish my assignments, still spoke loudly like nobodys business near was on the entire one point i really couldnt take it anymore and said loudly that i couldnt concentrate and went to lie down on my bed zzzz..sometimes i really feel they couldnt care less..oh well =(

My phone's been hangin alot on me these few days..wonder why..hmm..gets really annoying and the to restart it really takes a long time lor...haiz..time to get a new phone :P

Wanted to post pics but my stupid phone cable gt problems *&^%$#@..i wanted to save them on the pc coz it eating my phone space..bla..

Oh well..ooh ooh oohh..i can continue my Patapon'ing d! yay for me again =)

Need more games for my PSP =(

Time for bed! Sweet dreams all <3s~

Saturday, August 23, 2008


Huh? on and u will understand lolzz..

Someone sent this to me and i couldnt help but do it :P...its cute lar..try it =D

1. Which one of the following describes the perfect date?
a) Candlelight dinner (4 pts.)
b) Fun/Theme Park (2 pts.)
c) Painting in the park (5 pts)
d) Rock concert (1 pt.)
e) Going to the movies (3 pts.)

2. What is your favorite type of music?
a) Rock and Roll (2 pts.)
b) Alternative (1 pt.)
c) Soft Rock (4 pts.)
d) Country (5 pts.)
e) Pop (3 pts.)

3. What type of movies do you prefer?
a) Comedy (2 pts.)
b) Horror (1 pt.)
c) Musical (3 pts.)
d) Romance (4 pts.)
e) Documentary (5 pts.)

4. Which one of these occupations would you choose if you only could choose one of these?
a) Waiter (4 pts.)
b) Professional Sports Player (5 pts.)
c) Teacher (3 pts.)
d) Police (2 pts.)
e) Cashier (1 pt)

5 What do you do with your spare time?
a) Exercise (5 pts.)
b) Read (4 pts.)
c) Watch television (2 pts.)
d) Listen to music (1 pt.)
e) Sleep (3 pts.)

6. Which one of the following colors do you like best?
a) Yellow (1 pt.)
b) White (5 pts.)
c) Sky Blue (3 pts.)
d) Dark Blue (2 pts.)
e) Red (4 pts.)

7. What do you prefer to eat?
a) Snow (3 pts.)
b) Pizza (2 pts.)
c) Sushi (1 pt.)
d) Pasta (4 pts.)
e) Salad (5 pts.)

8. What is your favorite holiday?
a) Halloween (1 pt.)
b) Christmas (3 pts.)
c) New Year (2 pts.)
d) Valentine's Day (4 pts.)
e) Thanksgiving (5 pts.)

9. If you could go to one of these places which one would it be?
a) Paris (4 pts)
b) Spain(5 pts)
c) Las Vegas(1 pt)
d) Hawaii(4 pts)
e) Hollywood (3 pts)

10. With which of the following would you prefer to spend time with?
a) Someone Smart (5 pts.)
b) Someone attractive (2 pts.)
c) Someone who likes to Party (1 pt.)
d) Someone who always has fun (3 pts.)
e) Someone very sentimental (4 pts.)

Now add up your points and find out the answer you have been waiting for! Put your character in the subject line and forward to your friends and back to the person that sent this to you.
Very interesting to see 'who' your friends are!

(10-16 points) You are Garfield:
Youare very comfortable, easy going, and you definitely know how to havefun but sometimes you take it to an extreme. You always know what youare doing and you are always in control of your life. Others may notsee things as you do, but that doesn't mean that you always have to dowhat is right. Try to remember, your happy spirit may hurt you orothers.

(17-23 points) You are Snoopy:
You are fun; you are very cool and popular. You always know what's in and you ' re never out of style, y you are good at knowing how to satisfy everyone else. You have probably disappeared for a few days morethan once but you always come home with the family values that youlearned Being married and having children are important to you, butonly after you have had your share of fun times

(24-28 points) You are Elmo:
Youhave lots of friends and you are also popular, always willing to giveadvice and help out a person in need. You are very optimistic and youalways see the bright side of things. Some good advice: try not to be too much of a dreamer. Dreaming too big could cause many conflicts in your life.

(29-35 points) You are Sponge Bob Square Pants:
Youare the classic person that everyone loves. You are the best friendthat anyone could ever have and never wants to lose. You never causeharm to anyone and they would never not understand your feelings. Lifeis a journey, it' s funny and calm for the most part. Stay away fromtraitors and jealous people and you will be stress free.

(36-43 points) You are Charlie Brown:
Youare tender, you fall in love quickly but you are also very seriousabout all relationships. You are a family person. You call your Momevery Sunday. You have many friends and may occasionally forget a fewBirthdays. Don't let your passion confuse you with reality.

(44-50 points ) You are Dexter:
Youare smart and definitely a thinker... Every situation is fronted with aplan. You have a brilliant mind. You demonstrate very strong familyprinciples. You maintain a stable routine but never ignore a bad situation when it comes. Try to do less over thinking every once in a while to spice things up a bit with spontaneity!

Think abt this..

This thought came to mind one day, when i was really pissed..lolz

"..Its so easy to be angry at the people you care for the most coz you know that they will still love you anyway no matter what =)"


I think so too...:P

Oh well, people who make me get pissed at them sometimes are the same people who make me the happiest person all the time xD

And oh yes,

One down, 2 to go! Heh..handed in one of my assignments this morning and juz need to finish up on the other 2 and im free for awhile! kekkeke..28 days to be exact:P..

No frets..will start on this round earlier since my net is back on..wont so last minute liao ^^

Time to cook lunch! Im starved @_@ slurp!


Friday, August 22, 2008


Fine la!

If thats what u want, so be it!

I give up on doing anything d!!

Sigh =(


Its up n running again! yay!


Not really stable though, suspect its the modem settings..bla..

Need to ask bro d, its his modem..i can do other stuff juz not play games nia..

For now :P

Thursday, August 21, 2008

Almost slip my mind..

Happy Birthday Bro!

As annoying as u are sometimes..i still love ya jerk ;p

Hope u loved the cake we got u =D ...cute nerhs..haha


Did something today which i thought i would never do,

Felt horrid after i had done it, but it was something i needed to do.

It hurt alot..but i needed to prove a point, to myself..

Think sometimes, its better to hide in a corner and be invisible,

Its so much easier for me.. to keep everything in,

Than to wait for someone to tell it to.. :)

Wednesday, August 20, 2008


Sick sick sick sick!

Not happy now =(

And assignments due in 3 days...3 assignment...3 so dead..and guess what?


Had a nightmare abt not completing my assignments in time T_T *&^$#@


Monday, August 18, 2008


Dont treat me like an idiot.

Dont need me only when there is no one else around to need.

Dont juz share unhappiness with me.. Share with me joy as well.

Dont juz remember me when its lonely n saddening. Remember me when theres happiness too.

I have so much of other peoples sadness, i need some happiness to balance it up.

Dont take for granted that i will always be here.

Who will listen when i need them to?

Sunday, August 17, 2008

I wish.. be left alone.

Somethings are always easier said than done,

Promises that cant be kept should not have been made in the 1st place.

I read a friends' blog the other day, and how he said we had selective memory, how our brains choose to remember and forget what happens in our lives. People are certainly strong..n weak that way :) Guess thats what makes us humans..

But then..

There are alot of things you cant forget..or even if u tried, some small, little thing turns up and reminds you of it..

So, im juz saying..sometimes, things or actions that have been done..if it hurt anyone in anyway..will never be forgotten. Even though we will be much better off forgetting it ever happened..truth never goes away does it? :)

It sucks huh?

Thursday, August 14, 2008


Still bloggin in cc..zzzzzz


Call them a few times today and my conversations with them was..erm..irritating..

1st call(and this is after like pressin so many numbers juz to get to the help i needed..but cool):

Mi: Im calling to enquire abt my line transfer which i requested on Mon.Could u please check?

Operator: Ok mdm, let me chk ur status...


Op: Thank u for waiting, we've filed a report with the contractors and they will call u as soon as possible by today..

Mi: Ok! thanks..

4 hrs later....still no one calls..(am i suppose to sit ard and wait for them?)

2nd call

Mi: Im calling to enquire abt my line transfer which i requested on Mon.Could u please check?

Operator: Ok mdm, let me chk ur status...


Op: Thank u for waiting, we've filed a report with the contractors and they will call u as soon as possible by today..(note same conversation? *&^%$#@)

Oh well..make a long (and annoying) story short..i still havent gotten my line up yet..though the day of this post is posting it on Fri..and still no news zz.. was passed ard here n there..making me irritated early in the morning..Bravo TM! yayness..

Ok need to leave cc d..been here whole afternoon and forgot abt lunch also not to mention this place is dam cold lor..bla..too angry to eat..double bla..and my 3 assignments are due in a week..shit *&^%#$#@

Tuesday, August 12, 2008


Bloggin in cc is not cool..

Lucky there's no one standing behind me readin -.-"...I NEED MY INTERNET NOW!! *sob sob*

Oh, btw..HIE! Miss me or not? :P... Doubt anyone knows that i was even gone lor =(

Juz came to see see the new cc near my place and also not having internet for the past 2 days has been..erm..boring..but then its not like i really have the energy to do anything else..has been a tiring few days and its not even over yet zzzz...

Hopefully everythin will be done soon and goes back to is DEFINITELY NOT 2 places is really not veli cool as life is NOT cool now..lolzzz..

Oh well..need to be off d..its late and really am quite tired..another long day tomoro...

See you guys soon ya^^

Until then keep on missing me =)


Saturday, August 9, 2008


"When you get caught in the rain, with nowhere to run
When you’re distraught and in pain, without anyone

We keep prayin’ to saved, but nobody comes
And you feel so far away, that you just can’t find your way home
You can get there alone, it’s okay,
What you say,

I can make it through the rain, I can stand up once again
On my own and I know, that I’m strong enough to mend
And every time I feel afraid, I hold tighter to my faith
And I live one more day
And I make it through the rain"

This will be my last post for awhile peeps..

Take care ya =D

Until then...Miss me when im gone^^


Friday, August 8, 2008


Hate la!

Really really really not happy...zzzz


"If i was always left alone, by myself, then i wont feel lonely anymore, will i?"

I will get used to being alone, wont i?

I asked someone that qn sometime ago..but that person never replied me..

I still wonder....=(

Thursday, August 7, 2008


Counting down to house moving day...

I must say..we are very good tenants..good would be an understatement..GREAT TENANTS..lolz..alot of cleaning involved and my mum insist that we return it in pristine condition (although it wasnt so "pristine" when we moved in x.x)

Cleaning of new hse - Done (did the toilets smelled of bleach the entire day..uwek..)

Packing of old hse stuff - In progress..don think it will ever finish though...

Moving of packed things to new house - Step by step (oooh baby..gonna get to sorry..bleach killing my sensibility =x)

Lorry coming to get big stuff to new place - Pending (or shd i say the impending doomsday =x..juz cant wait! x.x)

and then..

More packing n packing n packing n packing....well u get what i mean..

Found alot of old stuff whilst good thing is..we always do our spring cleaning at this time..old pressies..old autograph books from school..and i juz discovered i have lots n lots n lots of soft toys..lots! =x

Took some piccys but too busy to post them now..need to go back to work..mum yelling..erm no..calling behind le..bleh~ will post when everything settled down..or if i can remember lolzzz..


Oh I had alot to say
Was thinking on my time away
I missed you and things weren't the same
'Cause everything inside it never comes out right
And when I see you cry it makes me wanna die.

I'm sorry I'm bad, I'm sorry you're blue
I'm sorry about all the things I said to you
And I know I can't take it back
I love how you kiss, I love all your sounds
And baby the way you make my world go 'round
And I just wanted to say I'm sorry.

This time I think I'm to blame
It's harder to get through the days
We get older and blame turns to shame
'Cause everything inside it never comes out right
And when I see you cry it makes me wanna die.

I'm sorry I'm bad, I'm sorry you're blue
I'm sorry about all the things I said to you
And I know I can't take it back
I love how you kiss, I love all your sounds
And baby the way you make my world go 'round
And I just wanted to say I'm sorry.

Every single day I think about how we came all this way
The sleepless nights and the tears you cried
It's never too late to make it right
Oh yeah sorry

I'm sorry I'm bad, I'm sorry you're blue
I'm sorry about all the things I said to you
And I know I can't take it back
I love how you kiss, I love all your sounds
And baby the way you make my world go 'round
And I just wanted to say I'm sorry.
I'm sorry baby.
I'm sorry baby, Yeah.
I'm sorry.


Well some of you might be pleased to knw that my installing of MS was abruptly stopped..Why? I dono also..its juz..ermm..hanged? zzz..oh well..i tried..not like i was gonna actually play anyway..

Weather is much better today..rained alot :) so was much cooling..hahas..but then that still doesnt change the fact that...


Im at a lost on how to pack anything anymore la T_T..dono whr to start..whr to wait it never ends T_____________________T

I donwan do anything d can? Juz sit there and do nothing =x ..sure will kena fked by mum de...hmmmmmmm..i wont la..sot meh..grumble grumble..

Juz found out PC Fair will goin on this weekend..well starting from friday anyway..yayness..but then shall probably go on fri..don like crowds =.=|| claustrophobic =x bleh~

Realised haven been really working..blame it on the hse moving..blame blame..really one lor..busy mah..not to say i don work ok? i do..its juz not the amount of time i would normally put in..hey! im not proud of it n shall make up for it once this is settled :P

Ooo..its Thursday d! coolio..weekends coming soon, bt i can foresee my weekend is not goin to be very fun...doinks..i wan to change phone! i wan my vaio! i wan my lcd monitor! i don ask for alot rite? its my money wor...its not like i ask ppl to get it for me..hint hint...and its things that i need..well..i do ok! bla bla..

Sleep time..zomg it 2 am @_@ buaizzzzzzzzz


Wednesday, August 6, 2008


Its a hot hot hot nite x.x..cloudy but still hot..doinks..

Maybe thats why im reinstalling brain not really comprehending what im doing..lolzz..



Or maybe im juz bored?



Nah, its the weather :P


Tuesday, August 5, 2008

Drats x.x

"Say Bloody Mary and spin 3 times, hear the bells and she will come for you through the mirror"

Dang x.x...watching the new season of Ghost Whisperer is the Month of The Hungry Ghost (7th month of the Chinese Lunar calendar)..watched the The Maid ytd nite..tms..why am i scarin myself T_T


Been really feeling down these past few days..but not anymore more self pity..thats really not its either u love me or hate me^^ so which is it? :P

Found a new thing i wanna spend money on LOL! shhh babe=x.. will post abt it once i have it in hand :P...dem need to get more money d ROFLMAO!

Did i mention that i, eh no, we have a lot of junk at home? we do *nods*

Aiks...time to continue to get scared shitless..buaissssss



It has been a hot week..even in the the sudden outbursts of "I hate myself's" ...well thats half true..

This is the 1st time in a long long time that i truly felt one who had the time to listen to what i had to say..and i was sad..and angry..for awhile..

These past few weeks had been tiring and alot of things going through my, studyin, family..Was really feeling down the entire evening..lucky there was finally a person who cheered me up by not asking wat happened and made me laugh instead (thanks mei <33)

I really feel now more than ever that i need space of my own..meaning to stay on my u would think why would i wanna do that..its juz something i need to do..its not that i don love my goodness i love them lots! juz that sometimes my home doesnt feel like my home..and my privacy is nvr mine..its a long story..u would understand if u were in my example of my lack of privacy? my mail reaches me opened and read x.x ...hmmm..need i say more?

Mum always said "if you do this, or if u do that..i would let u do whatever u want" which is almost nvr true..sigh..i donwan to go on...

Does no one ever listen to what i say? I doubt anyone reads my blog anyway..what if i changed my blog and kept one would even notice im gone..

To you - Im sorry for my coldness, but all i really wanted was fr u to make me laugh tell me jokes and make me forget abt my problems..i don need advices, or for u to ask wat happen when i tell u im sad..after my family, ur are the most dearest person to me and i love sorry if i seem to expect too much from u..i was juz disappointed..

I hate saying Goodbye..its a word that means farewell rather hear cya later..

Im much better that ive said what is in my mind XD..well at least i knw i will be ok..


Monday, August 4, 2008


I hate myself!

Cant be bothered with anything anymore..It juz seems pointless, useless..

I juz wanna..wanna..wanna..not do anything anymore! Sigh..

I want to give up..

Im so near the edge that one more nudge and ill fall over




Juz leave me alone =(

what i wish for..?

Im a simple girl with very simple wishes..and yet as simple as they may be..sometimes they never come out to what i expect them to be..and i think to myself why is life so unfair?

Wishes change every year..some will remain the same (to be happy among other things)..priorities change with isnt unfair..really..its juz how u make of it..

How happy we are in our lives really depends corny as it may is the truth..yet emotions are sometimes hard to control arent they? I knw..ive been there..

Ive always hidden from people..i always am the quiet one in the group, bt only if i dont really knw the ppl im wif..i take time to bond but when i do, i would do anything for may seem that im anti social but actually im protectin past has taught me abt more ways than anyone will ever knw..

When im hurt..i will happens so i keep away and juz keep silent until ppl forget abt me...funny rite? i don knw why i do it..

All i can say is - Miss me when im gone..?

P/S:My wish for you will never change..<3s~

Sunday, August 3, 2008

Cleanin Sunday...

Its been a tiring Sun mornin...woke up early and followed mum to new place to do some cleaning up..and it was juz the 2 of us..the rest of the family were sleeping like zhu's lolz..

It slightly smaller than the one we're living in now..single storey instead of double storey..we figured we din really need such a big place coz the only place we really occupy is the living room haha.. but still for 2 ppl to clean its still a pretty big place..

It has a big porch which is cool :) and facing mother nature..problem is i dono how we'll fit in all our stuff x.x... we have alot of JUNK! doinks..

Oh well..really tired now..and havent eaten @_@..will post some piccy of the new place once it really nice n clean :)


My life is like...

..a roller coaster ride... when its feels like im touching the there are no limits to my happiness.. when its feels like im crashing down at high speeds and cant stop being afraid that my heart will stop..

Have you ever had the feeling of being invited into someones life and the door closing in your face only to have them open it up, saying their sorry and closing it again? its a horrible feeling..

sometimes i dont know how to respond too much and im given short responses, it makes me feel like im probbing too much..give short responses and im being cold..and thus am not fun to talk to..

Am i a bother?


Saturday, August 2, 2008


At times..i feel this is the only place i can share my thoughts and feelings to..

To be able to pour out my feeling and not be juz listen..

What if i disappeared..?

Will anyone notice? Hmmmm....I wonder..

Random trail of thoughts..

"I was contented to juz have her by my side"

That was wat a friend answered me when i said how ppl are never contented wif what they have and cry when they actually lose it..He had jz came out of a r/s and though he seem quite nonchalant abt it..i knw it hurt him...

Why do we take things for granted? Why do we expect ppl who care abt u to be there always? I have been taken for granted all my my family, my frens, be needed only when im needed..its happened so many times that ive gotten used to it..and yet it still hurts every single time...but i get over it and i think of why i do only happy when the ppl i care abt are i let it go :)

Im easily contented and easily made happy..though i may seem moody at times but the correct words and the effort to cheer me up will make me happy again in no time lolz..

Oh well...C'est La Vie?



After my trip to Sin City was feeling really tired...been feeling tired the whole week d...guess it was coz of the running ard..kl and back, bringin mum to buy stuff for new place..bla bla bla...

Went into audi for like 5 games n was feeling really moodless d..maybe its the company..or the lack of it lol...sat ard watching csi and ard midnite went in HS5 to see see who was on..i really have nothing to do =x

LaRa immediately pmed and ask me to help some of the guild member get"".. well they needed a guy so used babe's acc to help them..and after that they wanted to help me too voila! eyez has a full bloom rose in his mouth also d :P..and did it in one try huh..well i had a good partner (thanks to fafa xD) i actually understood wat to do ady today lol...

It was quite tiring and they wanted ano to get full bloom i did..but couldnt really had to do it 3 times T_T...even fafa was tired and we were both cooling the end..this is it..the "full bloom flower gang" wakakaka :P

Then stoned ard for awhile while watching the gang was arguin wif another guild (don ask..drama drama drama in HS5)..played a few crazy fast songs and now half dead n blogging..hmmm..tot i had something else to blog but cant seem to =x

P/s: yes zhu, i was in game lolz..wat else can i do =x


Friday, August 1, 2008

Visit to Sin City...

Friday nites is my family's day to indulge...thus the trip to Sin City..or in normal people terms..the weekly nite market..lolz =x

I only follow them in like once a month..and they were surprised that i actually wanted to go this week (partly coz i was juz so dam bored x.x)..cant remember the last time i went though haha..amd since i din have dinner yet..i thought wat the hell..

Omg! Now i remember why i don go as often...the amount of ppl there @_@!! the amount of food there!! thus the name that i gave - Sin City -.-|| lolz..hawkers food galore and also small stores selling little knick knacks..its cool to go once a month but dont think i can do it every week..

The food - Boneless fried chicken, bread stalls (lots n lots of them), pizza, hawkers food galore, u name it..they gt it..too bad couldnt find my fav :P.. used to get it at the nite market in Farlim but tis was Perak Rd and i wasnt really familiar with the stalls there..awwww :(

Oh well here are some pics of the place..but my camera on my phone? Not COOL! will get nicer pics on my next trip ba (next month? :P)



Yay! Its the 1st of August!!


Ima bored!!

Played audi and Hs5...nothin like a no brainer to keep that brain dead as usual..Actually oni went into Hs5 coz fren wanted to get a blooming red flower and she needed someone who could yeah went in to help her out..din really knw how to get it..and she was very vague about it -.-... she tried herself a few times and couldnt get the one she wanted...then i played and gt it..haha! but mine is only half bloom red but it was bigger than hers lolzz..boy she freaked :P

In the end, she asked me to play for this point i still din understand wat i was suppose and not suppose to do..kept listening to them "Dont do this fm!, Do this fm!" zzzzz...after the 2nd time i stopped and ask "How do u actually do this??".. still answers that i got didnt really help -.-|| so dont ask me coz i still don get it..all i did was perf perf perf and chain :P.. apparently the flower will bloom more and change colours starting from white to pink to red if the cpl perf together or if the person who has the flower in their mouth perfs...she said it was a hard song to perf let alone chain..but i did..akakakakaka..bleh~ it was the 3rd and last try coz i was getting pissed also =x

Guess wat!! got the full bloom red for her xDD...she was happy..hehe.. wanna see the diff between mine n hers? ^^

Note that mine is the smaller bloom flower..haha...and hers is the full bloom one^^
Cool rite? Well Im happy wif i? Im lazy to go through it again for im contented with wat i have:P...