Sunday, February 28, 2010

Just finished crying my eyes out.... :(

Lol..Dont be worried (i mean u ever were ><...) Just finished watchin Hachiko, which pulled at all my heartstrings and made me feel so touched..u know la, emotionally high me :x Ive heard his story for so long, this is the first time i actually saw the movie. Though its an american adaption, still touching nonetheless.

Summary of Hachiko's story, which is a true story btw - its about this dog in Japan, who every day , would wait for his master at the train station for him to come home. One day, the owner suddenly died and nvr did get on that train and Hachiko continued coming back and waited at the train station for his master's return for 9yrs until he died of old age. There's now a bronze statue of him at Shibuya's station to honored this very very loyal dog TT^TT~

Wat la...really touching lor..wat can i say? Ima sucka for dog shows...esp ones like these coz its an actual story :(

So how was my weekend now that its almost 2am on a very early Monday morning, other than a very very very extremely blue-ish feeling? Ermm, numbness? Still watching my anime lolz :X

@Saturday - was spent at work, well, 1st part of it anyway. Wat else can i say other than it was extremeeeely boring? was extremely supercalifragilistic-ally boring? I wonder what i will write on my daily report...shit, have to do that tomoro..Guess ill have to bs ady =.= Lame can? Me and colleague were just laming the morning away.. tmd.

Anyway, was happy when i finally got home, hot hot day, had lunch and took a short nap. Woke up and went into audi and continued tagging hearts :) And very nice new rims babe, bery kakkoii!! ;)

Stopped awhile for dinner, and i took a nap again rofl, continued after babe came back and tagged till almost 1am-ish and went to another LP (when am i gonna get mine? TT^TT ..:P) Lol...uber tired. Met some idiots in audi, while tagging, bt shall not dwell into that. And my pc is giving me more problem by its constant crashing. Sigh. Think will send it to pc dude tomoro morning...hopefully he can fix it by the end of the day..

@Sunday - woke up early for Jp class @_@;; imagine waking up at 9plus on a Sunday~! Torturous also eh ><....luckily not many times ba..will bear with it..Class was good till the last 15mins when i found myself zoning out x.x Really bery sleepy suddenly :X

Went home, tagged abit with babe, my pc crashed 2 times =.= getting fked and irritating. Sigh, might as well dont have pc then can hide from the online world....omg..i might get withdrawal symptoms..Must go to those like Alcoholics Anynonomous de grps, except these are for ppl who cant stay from getting online LOL :x

Ok, dont mind the tired crapping :S

Slept abit, watched Fast & Furious 4 (yes, havent seen it yet..didnt even knw there was a 4 ><.) and Hachiko.. Had some chicken salad for dinner, lepak-ed in audi abit, and here i am.. tired and moody with alot of Pre Monday Blues *pouts*

Oh wells, another day, another week, another month tomoro..time is moving rather fast isnt it? Mama's bday coming soon too...wonder what we should get her. Hmmm..

Off to bed guys! Have a wonderful week ahead, though u might hate it, but still have to go through it, unless u suddenly get mc lol :X Be positive!! :p




& im sorry for acting up when it comes to that person,
it shdnt even bother me, and it wont anymore,
And sometimes i wish u were more patient with me,
my pc dying really not my fault T^T

Saturday, February 27, 2010

Hola people on a Saturday morning~ :)

Gonna head off to bed soon, so just a quick post before i do ;) Today's hols was basically, well, majority of the day was spent tagging hearts with babe :) Woke up early after he sms'ed and asked, went into audi. Tagged till about 1plus and had a break.

Babe went for lunch and did his stuff + sleep lol, while i loiterd at home alone coz family went out to eat choo char lolz. Wanted to follow, bt was lazy at the same time :X So stayed at home doggie sitting, had my laksa lunch and continued with my anime - Kaasan. Dam funny one really :D

Was feeling a little down in the afternoon, but that show really managed to lift my spirits up slightly :)

Family came home, went out again with dog and i just continued lying in bed. Surprisingly cooling afternoon leh...bery nice :D And luckily i didnt follow them go eat coz apparently the food not so nice anymore :p

Went back to tagging hearts after babe woke up and tagged fr about 7hrs str8 O_O;; Havent done that in awhile , so brain abit not functioning really well at the moment lol :X Watched dvd's and read some books while doing it lol.. and at the end of the day, we went to 2 lps (1of which we didnt really know) and 1 wedding - ptn's lol...yes again.. :X

Fruitful day, no? Lolzz..

Gonna head off to bed now...think will watch one more epi b4 i sleep though :D But having bad headache dy ..dono why :(


P/s: Thanks babe for tagging with me today...we're that much closer to the next ring le ;lub


Was feeling slightly down in the afternoon, luckily had my anime and baby's company lol.
Thanks ya :)
And ur right, i know it, i shdnt keep doing this to myself, i shd be happy more.
Ill try my best to keep my screwed up thoughts away.
Had a little revelation after i went toilet (yes! lol :x),
Its doesn't matter how worried or sad or how much i think about it,
Its not up to me to stop anything, its up to u,
When someone know hw much an action could hurt another and does it despite that,
We really cant do much about it , can we?
I hope it does not happen, but that is all i can do, Hope and a little bit of faith :)
I shant be worried over something which i have no control whatsoever over..
What ever u do or intend to do, please remember me.. :)

Friday, February 26, 2010

"To have others believe in you, you first need to believe in yourself"

I guess its true, the more u are afraid of losing something, the more u tend to lose it,
The more you keep telling yourself u cant lose, the more u tend to,
Dont know if its fate's way of telling us to have more faith, or its just our own doing for we do worst things when we are uncertain.
We try too hard, grip too tight and plead too much,
And believe me, its not the way :)

I keep telling this to baby, and yet i do the same thing, i really shd start listening to myself lol.
I really shd start clearing my closet of insecurities and doubts, and start believing again.

Im sorry i made it seem like i didnt trust you, ill try my best not to next time.

Sometimes, i dont know if im doing the right thing, staying on,
Would it be better if i didnt and walked away?
Would it make us happier? Hmmmm.. :)

No more thoughts for the night.. and welcome home babe :)

P/s: Was today the last time i would hear so much frm u in a day?
I hope that all goes well this time, and we stay as we were b4 u came back.
I have faith :)


Just had a haircut and dyed my hair :D, been meaning to do it since b4 CNY bt figured i had the long hols so kept postponing it. Then it was trips every single nite, so more postponing lol. In the end, hols was over and my hair looked like shit =.=

Finally asked sis to cut for me coz it was getting too thick and i came home with a bad headache from work. Even slept fr an hr and felt slightly better after that. Maybe its the late nites too. Thankfully no work tomoro! Yayness :D

Im kinda impatient when it comes to sitting down quietly. Half hr tops and i get squirmly le :X But bo pian la, still needed to have it done :D And i like it :)

Didnt join comp today, coz well, was sleeping lol and besides babe wasnt ard for moral support D: anyway, maybe one day break frm audi will bring more pro-ness out the next day? LOL :X

Bosses wasnt ard today, so peace and quiet, bt still got that dam form to fill out asdafuitehg =.=. Left work early anyway, too lazy le since tomoro hols lol :X

Came home to see siblings..both! mapling :O Sis even asked me wat her pass was...i made that acc fr her 3yrs ago ok? Cant remember d la =.= so end up, she's using my acc lol ..

And i just realised im writing incoherently again and my posts are all jumbled up. Oh wells, screw me.

Thinking of goin to bed early today, maybe see some animes or watch a dvd...hmmm.. we'll see :)

Oyasumi nasai~!

Thursday, February 25, 2010

Havin a bad headache at work.. think its the heat ><. And feeling uneasy.. =.=

OM passed me a Daily Report form this morning. We're suppose to be doing this now, writing down what we do in the day. Lol. There can only be 2 opinions on this move:

1. Bosses dont believe we have any work to do. And that we're too free hence we're forced to bs on this report.

2. Bosses still think we have nothing to do, so this task will actually mean we're doing something with our time.

Lol. Either way, i hate filling out forms like this coz its only 2 ppl working in the dam office. And do they think its our fault we have nothing much to do? Not that im saying im free.. IM NOT. Still doing that fkup website designing. And they say like its so easy, bt dont wan to pay for ppl's services (i.e pro ppl who actually do this for a living?)

Not happy at all. Still need to do it though. But doing it unhappily =.=

Fell asleep at lunch and now im hungry d ><. Luckily almost time to go home :)

And oh ya, have a safe trip back babe~ :)

P/s: Got a paper cut again today...pain la! :( Looking for some sayang...anyone? Pls? :(

Officially started 1st lesson in JP class :D Left work sharp so that i could come back in time and rest abit before going. Class started at 7.30 though :) It was cool and the teacher was actually not that bad.. he emphasized alot on pronunciation which is cool by me, learning to say it correctly is very cool ;)

1st class was basically like learning your abc's, just that theirs is called Gojyuuon - or the 50 basic sounds of the romanji..i think lol :X Brain pretty tired now la, just figured i shd quickly post this if i shd forget all abt it tomoro :S Alot of a e i o u's ...ya ya...just that its not pronounced how we learnt in kindy ok? Different sounds totally. Note to self: must bring water next week...coz mouth dam tired and dry after all that :X Overall, quite happy with 1st class, and lookin forward to next lesson! :DD

Work was erm, okok ba...nothing much. Still working on webby, here and there ba unless i get interupted to look for this and that, which is pretty annoying =.= Bah, works sucks, so shall not dwell into details.

Lunch time went over to Queensbay, thought of eating bread for lunch...u knw those like Bread History kind of breads? Diverted into Bead Zone while looking and ended up getting toe rings :P Ive been meaning to get the ones i lost quite some time lor...just lazy to walk over under the hot sun even if it only takes me about less than 5mins to actually reach the place ...hahahah :x

Can u believe there are not such shops in Queensbay?? The best i could find was only Roti Man or something to that effect. Tmd. Somemore the breads not even that nice D: Shd have gotten sushi instead la. Bodo bodo me.

Well, come str8 home after lessons and joined cpl compy, which results were not so good :'( Maybe my pc idle too long le, so abit laggy, and so was net connection and also my blurness...sad sad sad. Shd hope that i do better ma, i feel so discouraged tonite T^T~

Played abit with babe and some old friends and left soon after. Watched abit of CSI- new season wor !! :D and now nodding off at pc..Really tired frm ytd ba...and really tired now too. And omg la, its almost 3am again D: D:

Thank god friday is a holiday again :) As if i will sleep in...i just wake up early nia...must must sleep more! :x

Okok sleeepp!!! Ciaoz~!! :D


2nd day, and ur still here..
Just like old times, i missed it so.
And i dread when the day it goes away again..
But like i said, no one can promise tomoro...just live for today :)

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Hoho!! 1st day of work!! Conclusion = Sleepy as hell man :X

Though i was suppose to officially start work on M0nday, bt laziness gt the best of me and mc slowly crept from behind... ima such a model employee :S Not bad lar...some ppl actually start today also lor... D:

Work was erm, lost to me.. Couldnt find the things i stopped doing abt 10days ago lol D: And had to make sense what i didnt finish..(luckily not to much) Was suppose to start on website designing for comp (though i did hope the bosses forgot...wat la! they're not hiring me to do designing work lo!..cheapskates..)

Went through half the day, sorting out papers after papers after papers..i was basically piled up with papers =.= And then sometime in the afternoon, she remembered le! ><. And ask me if i was looking into it..Sigh...Im nt that good at designing webbies de lor...thank god i found a site which was quite easy to handle and str8 forward! But by the time i actually found it, almost time go hm liao lol :X Did halfway le la..shall look more into it tomoro :D

And office was DAM HOT today! asdjqariuqerfpoejrfqpoejfrqef :S

Left office quite late le, ard 6plus, came hm, had dinner, and went into audi.. New moves eh...weird and confuses me (excuses :X) Saw baby and joined her for inter comp. Not very good results so shall not mentioned it D:

Practiced by myself abit and babe came in. Practised abit more and went to exp comp :) Me so proud of meself tonite!! :D Made it through Rd1 - 2nd place :D , coz i x8 :p and made it through Rd2 also 2nd place O_O!! At the last 20secs, my hand were like shaking lor...couldnt believe i didnt miss much wor and chain chain chain :D Bery bery proud of myself! Hehehe...and babe was my supporter behind :3 Didnt pass Rd3 though, lagged and made me miss my fm TT^TT~ Besides, it was a tougher grp.. i think.. Babe shd have played for me! D: hahahaha :X

1st Rd~ :)

2nd Rd ~ :O

Played abit more after compy with ahp and diana and then headed off to cpl compy :) We made it to till semis! O_O! Im quite surprised with my playin tonite...misses here n there, bt still better than i expected wor :D Lucky i have a pro cpl, eh babe? :p Too bad lost in semis, coz abv 120 de speed, i basically lose control liao :( Sorry babe....i will jy practice de! Compy's are fun! :3 I still feel if i had a better grip, would have made it to another rd in both comps de ><. Bah me.

Prelims & 1st rd met the same cpl lol ~

2nd Rd - met with serene n hanhan lol :)

3rd Rd~

4th round got take but mai put song :X Could have done better de! Bla bla :S

Anyway, played abit more with guild and before we knew it, its 1am dy....and now its well, late? :S And getting hungry le...zzzz ..I see Pringles! Lol..

Oh wells, time for bed. Overall day, happy with my audi'ing ...though i dono why i suck at normal games today, kept missing like siao, even b4 comp =.= Maybe comp more challenge which brings out the best in me? :X Hehe ..



& how long will it be like today?
it seemed just like old times,
I hope u can be the better friend that u promised..
One last try? :)

Tuesday, February 23, 2010

Its been a long Monday indeed ..

Didnt go to work on Monday, took mc instead lol. Wasnt really in the working mood and alot of conflicts in me at the moment. Went to bed almost 6 am coz was watching some show on astro with mum..think i fell asleep almost at the end though, but woke up b4 it finished ><.
Slept the morning away, and though i knw i havent been crying, woke up puffy eyed and major headache. Perfect hangover from disappointment :)

Anyway, joined exp comp and cpl comp today :) Got in 2nd round of exp comp and cpl comp too lol.. sigh, i suck eh? Maybe u shd get a new partner....

Surprisingly i got 2nd eh! :D I was 1st lor...if only that dude didnt chain :( Bla him.

Whole day was spent, staring blankly at the pc, watching anime online while trying to get my mind off where u really were. And all alone in audi.. I shd just quit :(

U dont need me, not now, not ever. Ur decision to go off already proved that to me. Wat was more impt is urself. No one else. As long as u got wat u planned for, no one else mattered. So, u got wat u wanted. Happy? Is that really love? Lol.

Ive made my decision, and ur no longer in it. Uve choosen ur path and so have i. I do not wish to bear witness ur so called quests anymore.

Was also transferring my contacts from old phone to new one (finally! lol) and saw the old sms'es from u. Ones which i nvr get anymore. Ones which showed u were truly concerned about me. U said im childish over those msgs which i nvr got, bt not to me. Coz it showed how much u wanted me to be involved in your life. And apparently these ppl knw more about whats goin in your life than me. I just want the old friend which i used to know, the one who would ask me abt my day without me asking. I really dont knw u anymore. But I really shd be honored that i was treated better than ur other friends, or so u say :)

If im really just an audi companion, so be it. I will stop playin and that will be then end of this friendship right? If its only company u seek, im sure u can get others as quickly to replace me, since there are quite a number of despos in audi nowadays :)

Still torn over what to do...if i really leave, i think i would miss, not audi, but the ppl. But then again, i only play for a few ppl..esp you. Maybe i wont feel so loss without it afterall ..

Time for rest, mental and emotional preparation for work tomoro ><. Ciaoz~

Monday, February 22, 2010

Just finished prayers for the ninth day of CNY, which is also the official 1st day of CNY for the Hokkein community. Mum went full blast this year, with the complete set of prayers equipment lol..From sugar canes to the big joss stick outside the house. Sadly for me, i couldnt really participate in alot of the prayers coz my condition. =.= Mum was pissed, say couldnt help me "kai", as if it was my fault. Sighs.

Kinda zoned in and out while mum and sis did preparations, dug hole for the big joss stick and basically waited for it to turn 12pm. Just finished up everything and its already 2am. Kinda tired and dont really feel like working tomoro :X I feel an mc creeping up on me ><.

Fireworks seems to be more at this time of celebration, guess coz Pg is mainly of Hokkein ppl :) Bro was thinking of getting also, not sure if he will though, says its about RM400 for those big types.

Day has been rather quiet, feeling uneasy the whole day.. audied here and there abit, with ray, tagged exp for diana abit along with ahp, and that was about it. Oh yea, watched some Monsters Vs Aliens cartoon along the way :X

So thats about it, my sunday and my cny hols. Though it was good resting but overall, not a very good holiday. Oh wells.

Seriously contemplating on taking sick leave tomoro, dont feel up to work on a Monday and well, just not really up to doing much.

Off to bed, i guess :) Ciaoz~


It was dumb of me to think u were busy at work, when u were obviously not,
U were busy having fun, as usual, even though what had transpired the nite b4,
It saddens me that u dont take me seriously, maybe i made it that way,
Though i dont knw who u were with, ur silence told me everything,
Was it the same person we were arguing about?
Or the person u so solemnly declared to me u were not planning on seeing?

Now tell me, why do u say im always disappointed with u?

Sunday, February 21, 2010

We go through life wondering if each path we took was the right one. If the path we took was the better choice and less regrets later in life. If the path we chose, would bring us happiness. True happiness that will last forever.

Yes, i still believe there is such a thing and it does exist, and i shall not let anyone or anything taint that perception of mine. My dad did it once in my life, and i refuse to let anyone else do it. Promises made, shd always be kept, or they shd nvr been made at all. Humans are humans, i cant deny that, but once that bond of trust has been broken, nothing can ever mend it to what it was.

Bond between family, between lovers, between friends.. all sacred in their own way.

U might think im conservative, maybe i am when it comes to this. I dont believe in making excuses to hurt other ppl jz cause i was hurt myself. An eye for an eye is nvr the best solution, regardless of what movies tells us. Someone will always get hurt and its almost never a happy ending.

Ive been pitying for myself these cpl of days, coz i somehow became "devalued" and deemed worthless. Truth is i brought it upon myself to think i was worth less than those ppl u "cared" more. Im not, my feelings are real and not momentary sparks and fun, its deeper and will last longer than that. But sadly, its not worth much in this day and age where 'open-ness' seem to be the in word.

When i say i will be there, i will. When i say i care, i mean it. When i cry, its real tears.

I am disappointed. But not in you, in me. Coz i have made myself "cheaper" than those ppl that u have in your life now. In my desperate attempt to hold on, ive lost grip of myself and my self worth.

Do not blame the world for what sorrow u have, coz no matter what has happened in your life, you have no right to go about claiming redemption on love from everyone just because you are hurt. Face it, challenge it and prove to urself that you can be a better person.

If u are truly happy doing what u have been doing all this while, so be it. But i do not wish to be a part of your life anymore. I will not stand by and see you hurt everyone and worst of all lying to urself. I will not be hurt in this game of yours be it in real life or in virtual.

Do not blame me for being disappointed or assuming or accusing you for anything. U did all that on your own hun :)

Totally, most definitely, annoyed!!! Can u believe it?? 5 fkin power trips in one bladi nite??? Wth is TNB is doin?? Its been a week and today is the worst with trips every one hr starting frm 7pm jz now. Im just freakin annoyed that i called and scolded the customer service ppl. As if it would do any difference though, but hell yea it was good release!!

At this rate, i might as well just take my pc and put it in the dumpster =.="

Givin us lame excuses abt power surge, when its only 5hses that are affected and except for us, the rest like go to bed at 9? Its just friggin lame la, they cant even solve something like tis and its been one week and about 15trips =.= Ridiculous ok?

Saturday came and went, usual stuff, audied abit in the morning, still hangover frm friday early morning games with the gang lolz. Wanted to go back to sleep, but in the end, keep waking up and so made lunch and slacked ard the tv, watching dvd's. Fell asleep abt 6'ish bt then the tripping started and woke me up D:

So basically, rest of evenin just went downhill, with hourly trips. My pc will certainly die soon. But then i guess it will be for the best, for i dont see any consolation in being online anyway. Day just nvr got better, esp after some turn of events. Anyway, pointless to say anything more.

Just audied for abit, spammed kb's abit, bt nothing can really bring me up tonite. Guess im gonna head to bed and dream my hurt away.

Ciaoz~ :)

P/s: @ time of posting it came up to 7 power trips. Bla.

As i write and delete and write and delete,
Trying to get out the words and the feelings im having now,
Nothing seems to be correct way of putting it.
Maybe there isnt a good way of sayin it, hence,
It shall remain unspoken with me.

All i can say is it hurts me that ive become so unworthy in your eyes,
When i used to be otherwise when u first left.

U could nvr resist doing what you do, not in real life or in virtual, even when virtual was supposed to be my sacred place where i thought i could have yr honesty. Was it ever only our lalaland?

Yes, we still hope.

But hope has run out on me tonite.

Saturday, February 20, 2010

Hola people on a lovely saturday morning!! :D

Reason im bloggin now, is cz i intend take a short nap later @_@ Sleepy man...Dont think its a good idea though, coz brain is slowin down. Audied with babe, ahp and diana till abt 5am lol :X And yes, we've joined Ahp's guild lol :) But...LaLaLand lives on forever! Thank god i remember can transfer to Ivan so no need break fam ;sob...My lalaland wor...must live forever n ever ;)

lClhocolates~ :)

Ytd was mainly audi day, abit in the afternoon, then a whole lot frm 7 onwards..for me though :S Its been awhile since i really played so much, till my fingers were protesting d. I dono how u do it babe, dont like u d ;eeks

Joined both Exp and Cpl comp ytd. Exp comp, not so good as predicted, coz i was seriously blurry, and though i even x6 in the end i lost =.= SERIOUSLY need to practice my C3, so not cool when i lose like that when i obviously could have won. Sheeesh!

1st rd was a breeze in Cpl comp :X Chained more than i thought i could, and didnt miss as much as i expected :O Bery unexpected... :D, 2nd rd not so good, oh wait, it was good, but met yorke and cpl and she chained slightly abit more...we lost by abt 9k nia ><. Not a bad improvement though :D But then again, its slow song wor...hmm..:D

Guess thats about it, somethings worth to be remembered, some best forgotten and move on :) Cant believe im down to my last day of my holidays! TT^TT~~ I wanna go get mc d..Eh, but still next Friday is a holiday for me :DD But Monday sucks man ><. Bla. ><. Ciaoz peeps, laters!


I dont have a good feeling about your new 'friend',
Dont like their intentions, nor their actions,
Maybe im thinking too much abt it, I hope i am,
And i trust u to do the right thing,
So, Ill let it pass, for now ;)

Friday, February 19, 2010

Time does not wait for anyone, neither should i.
What was said, has been said, and no one can take it back.
There are no wins or loses. Just alot of hurt.

Early morning power trip woke me up this morning. Wth, nw its in the morning. Thank god it only lasted about 10mins. But then again, it happened when i just got my pc running after it had almost crashed again. Nice job TNB, seems like ur trying to really kill my pc =.= Another one in the early evening while i was in audi, also less than 10mins disruption but still painful to see my pc go blank again. Idiots... 'nuf said.

Not a good way to start the day and it just went downhill there onwards. Was supposed to go out and go to the bank with sis coz might not find a parking space. She slept n slept till it was almost 12. When she finally woke, i asked if could go out now, and all mum n sis had to say was "Its lunch time" Banks dont close during lunch k? I got so annoyed, i mean if they didnt wan to go just tell me, instead of making me wait whole morning. Havent spoken to them since. Ill get it done myself tomoro.

Like i said, audied in the morning, abit in the afternoon and all the way through the evening. Played till my eyes glassed over, my brain stop understanding and my fingers couldnt really press anymore. And no, it didnt really help. Whatever.

Stalked ahp and diana and played with them till pinny came. Then Babyval joined us and well, she said some things which opened up a wound again. I will nvr understand why u need to do what u did and say what u said to her. Not just her, every single person. I will nvr ever understand. Left with pinny and played with her for abit and chatted abt her stuff abit before she had to go off to satisfy her Coffee Bean cravings. Even sei Plutonian stalked our room for a cpl of games b4 heading off to stalk other ppl.

At some point, someone commented our room really full of WS's and one SuperStar lol.
Oh well, their a dime a dozen now :)

Came out, had a late dinner and watched some lame ass Sorority Row, another one of those mindless killings type =.= But brain too tired to really get scared. Besides, it was lame? Lol.

Anyway, off to bed coz i really really have had a rough day. Gonna finish up my choco milk while playing some patapon on my psp and fall asleep doin that :)



I dont think i can hurt more coz its already become numb.

Thursday, February 18, 2010

Christmas Party, My 9 wishes for you blasted in my ears,
The music was so loud, i couldnt even hear anything from outside anymore,
And yet i could hear my thoughts still, ever so clearly.

If i had pretended i didnt see wat u said, would we be happier?
If i had let it go, would we still be the same now as we were ytd?
If i didnt keep counting the stats in my head, would this have not mattered at all?

The fact is, it matters,
For i am not even worth 1/10 of the total u did sent out.
You might this is all irrelevant and im being emotional again,
But think of me, if u were me, all those times u say u were busy n couldnt reply,
Dont say i make assumptions, ask urself 1st why?

I almost teared today, bt i wont, not for u, as much as i felt the hurt.
U sure do know hw to make a person feel "important"

Thank you so much for the being the best friend ever :)

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Hola peepos~!

Skipped out on ytd's post, coz well, i forgot to save one and when i remembered it was already past 12 =.= Not that there was much to blog about anyway :X Maybe this post will be slightly longer then? Here goes...

Day was basically spent on bed. Oh my.. Family went up to yes, they didnt manage to drag me out of the house..its so bladi hot, i seriously DO NOT wanna go out. Fact is, Cameron is also hot hahahaha...they told me that when they came back :p

Soooo..basically spent the RE-WATCHING old shows again n again .... Back to the future 2, Supernatural, and other shows which i suddenly cant recall...maybe i fell asleep? Lolzz. Had to make my own made. Fettucine! Yay! Its been awhile since i cooked for myself and being home alone has it upsides :) No mum, no sis, no dog :O Peace and quiet for me and note: no headphone was required to shut out sound :p Dont get me wrong, i love my family, just well, i need time away frm them sometimes :X

They came back slightly after 9 and had dinner, with the veggies they bought up there. Quite nice i must say, bery fresh haha :D

And that was my Tuesday, well spent :) By doing nothing much, touche~ :p

Did i mentioned, power trip again in the afternoon? *shakes head*

Woke up late and was supposed to go out and get some particulars at USM, but it was kinda late and needed to go to the bank too. In the end, went nowhere and stayed at home playin abit of poker and etc etc lol. Audied later after that, and i still need to say, chancing sucks, big time. But im still glad im practising it lol :X Hopefully i think im gettin abit better at it, me thinks D:

Anyway, for some strange reason, C9 came in to our lives alot tonite. Joined quite a number of rooms which had it. Its like fate had a hand in it coz later we joined compy and alot of C9 modes came out. I only made it through 1st rd, and 2nd rd was a close call, also C9.. Bah. But whole compy didnt have 4k at all, not sure abt the finals though.

Suddenly babe suggested we join cpl compy O_O; Heart stopped a beat but kinda excited too lol, just as long as he doesnt get irritated with my noobness in cpl mode :S Quite fun i must say, though only made it through prelims, coz i was laggin in the 2nd rd :( Sorry babe ><. Need to practice my perfs and chains and also not to miss too much *notes to self* :)

2nd round - Couple comp :)

And that was it, 2 days of nothing much and yet im tired o.O lolzz.. Pc still dying once in awhile..keeps coming out the crash dump blue screen. I figure it would be a matter of time b4 it really dies :X

3 more days before my days of slacking end... omigosh..MC time!! :x

Baizzzzz ~!

Monday, February 15, 2010

Hello world @ 15th Feb~!

Still sleepin as much, fb'ing not so much, audi'ing like rarely, and i figure ive watched the dvd's at my hse like more than 3 times on a average scale? =.= Still poker'ing much that i have actually neglected my other games lolz.

Still havin the same steamboat... MENU PLEASE? :S

Oh ya, power trip..yet again =.= Its getting really damn irritating..very very irritating.

Seriously though, i have nothing really to blog about, coz basically.. day has been spent mainly in bed or on comp table. Hence i have a feeling my butt is getting Lolzzz :X And to think i still have about 6 days to go..hmmmm..

Oh wells, family is thinkin of goin up to cameron highlands tomoro, and basically hinting on me to go as well . Fact is? I dont wanna go :S The last time was horrid enough and i seriously cant take my brother's driving up winding roads, nor do i wanna drive. Sigh, dilemma.

Guess thats about it. Nothing to bitch about when im not working.. lmao! Im such a bitch at times ;)

To Jf: Nah, oranges being slaughtered mindlessly! :p

Ciaoz peeps, gonna go watch sis play some detective games..hehe :D

P/s: Im so late in my posts....bah bah black sheep! :x


To understand others, you need to understand yourself first.

Sunday, February 14, 2010


Tis' is the time where oranges are slaughtered mindlessly and pockets are dried out not only for red packets but also for flowers and chocolates and what not :p JUST KIDDING!!! :D

So what have i been up to? Other than sleeping, eating (steamboat for the past 2 days, and i foresee many more days to come ><.), watching dvds, fb'ing? Erm..just everything i just mentioned, repeatedly done, over n over n over again :S

Also TNB has been a friggin big pain in the behind, with 2 trips ytd and another one earlier tonite which lasted about 2 bladi hrs D:< time =".=">_>"

Anyway, no visiting this year, and guess my hong bao count is getting lower. But then again, for mum its worth it coz my other cousins "breed" like rabbits :X I mean seriously, every year there's a new niece/nephew which i have nvr seen? :O

V-Day? Nothing much, just like CNY, it just died off quietly lol.. Its just an over-rated, over-commercialised day to get ppl to spend un-neccessarily just to prove that they love someone. Only for that day? Of coz u might say, im only sayin this coz i got no one to celebrate it with, bt ur so wrong :) I just feel its all a load of crap. Everyday shd be V-day! Minus the flowers, fancy dinner and chocs ;)

Basically thats about it and oh yes, babe got me hooked on playin poker lol.. I knw mei mei and raych used to force me to play all the time, bt i didnt try coz well, i suck at poker :S Reason why im trying it this time is coz i have about 8 days on my hand to spend slacking about, so i thought
what the hoot? :p

In spirit of tradition, as corny as it may sound, i would like to wish all my family and friends a great year 2010 ahead! May the year of the tiger bring u more luck, more prosperity and more happiness!


For V-Day or love love day as they call it :)

I wish all those who are in love, stay in love, respect and be
thankful that you have each other. Never take the other for granted because u nvr knw when u might lose them. Love and cherish for always ;)

"I will be by your side, and hold your hand when u falter, smile when u are happy and cry when u are sad. You will be my soul mate, my best friend, my confidante. And while u sleep, i shall whisper in your ear, how much i love you and how grateful i am to have found you :) "

Until the day i find you ~

Enuf corni-ness for the nite folks! ;)

Guten nacht!!


How could something that is frowned upon bring a new revelation to your life?
I just wish, u wont do the one thing that will hurt me the most,
Coz i dont think i can let it go this time around.

Im not afraid of walking away anymore :)

Saturday, February 13, 2010

Sleeeepyyyy n tireddddd... I wanna go take a nap d ;eeks

Its been a long and tiring day, and woke up extra early today coz needed to help mum with preparation of steamboat for reunion lunch n prayers. This yr sis is not ard to help out coz she needed to go help out a friend at his hair saloon. So it was only me n mum...which not always good news. Coz when she panics or rushes for time, some ppl will go down...and that person this yr would only be me >////<. Even the beginning didnt start out so well, thankfully everything went smoothly shortly after that and what can i say? Im efficient :p But dam tired after the whole thing ><.

My new headphones~ :D At least i can hear it better now ~ Lovin it ;)

Went into audi for abit and played with ray awhile then went to have dinner and got sms frm babe sayin he was in audi. Went in, played one game and poof, the electricity tripped :((. Its always like that de, only my hse and a few others on the same row. Sadd ><. Even tried calling TNB, but dam phone lines were engaged like crazy. Came back an hr later and babe had to leave le...sad again :( And guess what? Shortly after coming out of audi, my power trip again! This time i was just too annoyed and just laid in bed and fell asleep. It came back on abt 30mins later. Sigh.

Its been a sad and depressing CNY eve nite :(

Gonna head off to bed soon, coz frankly, i just dont know wat else to do, and its already 3.30 am anyway lol. Im just so ....i dono. Words cant define how im feeling now.

But, Happy Chinese New Year 2010 guys~ And Happy V-Day everyone~~!! :3

Oyasumi~ :)


I didnt want to spoil it, the happy parts,
I nvr intended it that way.
Which is harder? To hold on or to let go?

How can the person who makes u the happiest, also makes u the saddest?
How can there be so much care and love one minute & so much contempt and hatred the next?
How can a person promise something to your face & turn ard just to break it the next instance?
How can ppl lie and say its all for our best? Best for who?
So many how's, why's, so many qns left unanswered, and shall remain unanswered.

Bitter sweet emotions carry me through the days,
The memories of the past, seemingly hides from view but pops out its head once awhile,
Just to bring back memories of what was before, the good and the bad..

All i know is, treasure the ppl that u have now, make the choices your willing to live with,
And nvr blame the world for the path u chose,
Coz sometimes momentary sparks are just that, pretty in the beginning,
But dies away nonetheless.

I feel myself repeatin this over and over again,
All i hope for is that you see it.


Sorry for the last posting, mainly coz i was sleeping most of the time on Friday.
It felt like i havent slept for the longest time, and i loved it lol :)
And to think i still have 9 more sleeping days to go :p

Babe came over and helped him fix his new car plates, which looks cool btw ;) then tested my new headphones, courtesy of babe, which i really love :) Shall post piccys tomoro, coz room is too dark to transfer it out of my phone ><.

Need to go to bed again le, early day tomoro, preparation of steamboat stuff for reunion and also prayers.

Ciaozz~!! :)

Thursday, February 11, 2010

My pc almost died tonight!!!!! TT^TT~~!! Well almost...still handling it with care bt feel i shd take it to the doc tomoro coz i just started my friggin hols leh!! If my pc guy also off, then wat the hell am i gonna be doing??? ;wild ;wild I knew something was wrong few days ago when i switched it on..i dont wanna take any chances, takin it to pc guy tomoro morning and let him chk, coz it was the same symptoms as last time...until obs tonite, if hang again, gonna take it to him later =.=

Have u ever felt so so in between 2 choices, u just couldnt decide? Thats hw i felt jz nw. I tot my pc had died, so went to install audi in sis pc (LOL! Shh..she keeps deleting it =.=) the there was like 9patches, halfway through, i went and on my pc again, and surprisingly it came ALIVE! BUT! Net had went off, can still continue patching but cant try to open browsers on my pc =.= It was already halfway through bt still long way, and i wanted to try b4 pc guy came to my hse to collect. So, to restart modem and lose patching so far or restart only to have my pc die again and repatch from start? Hmmmmmmmmm....

Anyway, that was a good 2hrs of sloggin in front of pc, swearing and cursing in between. I dono why life has a knack of trying to screw with my hols.

Work was fine throughout the day, busy as hell, bt still survive-able. Went to get babe's car plates during lunch...Hot hot hot!! And freaking jam jam jam everywhere..And my car was basically an oven =.= But still, happy that i got the plates back...if only i can find a car to see if it fits ... why is it, when i dont need it, its all over the place but when i do, i cant seem to find any? >_>"'

As i said, work was busy until abt 4 when my mouse of a boss asked me this.."Mag, are u free? Can u send me to the bank?" *gasppppsssssss in the depths of my soul* Of coz if given a choice, i would have said, "No, im busy" LOL! =.= There are 2 scenarios which could happen on the way to the bank..
1. Total silence and major awkwardness
2. Him asking me about my family background and making me totally uncomfortable, which is even worse.

Lucky for me, he chose No.2 ._.

The, how many sibling do u have, hw we celebrating cny, bla bla bla, etc etc jz made me feel veryyy uncomfortable. This is the reason why, unless we are certified drivers, should NEVER ever drive the boss ard. Bah. Drove as fast as i could, and even had to send him to fish shop to get fish food. Wth? Came back office, did some clearing up and left as soon as it was time to avoid them asking me to do anythin else..lolol :x

Came home to a sad pc, which i think im gonna take to the shop tomoro and let them have a chk. I dont want it to breakdown during cny -.- I just feel the HD is abit unstable. Sigh.

Heading to bed i guess, back pain, coz i fell asleep on couch earlier. Oh wells~

Nites peeps! *loves*

P/s: The start of my 10 days slacking is finally here :3~!! and have a safe trip back babe :)
1st of all, random nothings which i find, are amusing :-

Go to and type in ur 1st name.. see what comes out. Its suppose to be pasted on FB status, but mine is just..well.. see what i got for my name..

Mag-duh-lay-nuh - (noun). Origin: Magnanimus Pius (Polish, meaning "thieving magpie").
1. A girl who either steals your heart away like a thieving magpie would a shiny object or who resembles the small black-and-white bird in appearance.
2. Often used to describe the most beautiful girl you've ever seen. Can also be used to describe the most beautiful black-and-white bird you've ever seen.
3. "Rare beauty"... in bird-watchers' terms.

Does it mean im a beautiful girl or a bird? O_O;; Im so not gonna put this on FB =.=

Another random thing...

My Chinese New Year shoesss!! Lol :X But its cute right? :p

Work was tiring as usual today.. lots of stuff to clear up and im happy with how my banner turned out :) Bosses were happy with it hehe :D Not that im happy i pleased them, bt happy that i got it done :DD Also got my back number plates for my car fixed! Seriously, this is like the 3rd or 4th time ive changed it...alot of ppl like to kiss my car butt =.= But! I forgot to collect urs today babe! T_T.. Took mum to buy stuff after work and halfway choosing sotongs..i was like SHIET!! ;wild... nvm, i go take tomoro during lunch :)

Anyway, took mum to get her groceries and Tesco was weirdly deserted. Got our stuff and went home. Took a bath, too late to join compy d so decided to practice my chancing. Lol..yea yea, im finally gonna to do it.. bt i did chance alot recently lor, jz when it gets confusin, i tend to give up..hmm..wish me luck ba :)

Mum and sis are better today, and my god, just 2 days of silence frm them and today, mum is talking like she hasnt been talking for a week @_@;; I needa go sleep just to make her stop D:

Last day of work! Finally! And im not dead! Haha :D Hopefully it will be a smooth day tomoro and ill get to enjoy my hols more. Heck even if its a bad day, im gonna enjoy it still ! :D

Just came out of audi and well, got acash just now :S One thing bad, when i get upset, i tend to spend...and when i get upset abt audi, i tend to console myself with acash =.= Sheesh. Well, its been 3 months since my last purchase..shd be forgive-able :P

Sleeping time! My eyelids really are droppin d x.x



I wont force it, but i wont let it slack..
and i dont like to be challenged :)

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Im so freaking tired that i feel like just fainting right here now ><. Im serious, really feeling dizzy and abit out of co-ordination with what im doing. And bosses just asked me to design some banner thing and its so near cny d. Really really cant concentrate properly and very unproductive coz i seem to be moving at slow-mo all of a sudden. Wonder if family virus have caught up with me..shiet!

Thank god its lunch break. But my eyes are glassing over. My goodness..><.

Almost time to go back to work, omg omg omg..need to drink a few more cups of coffee nao D: And worst part is, dont think can go back to sleep str8 after work, still need to go grocery shopping ..ahh...shall sleep when i get hm after that, and then wake up in the middle of the nite again =.=

Laters guys~!

1 more day..1 more day *chants*


Still feeling down about audi.
Disappointed with myself, are u with me?
Do you know its the same for me?
I need to be looked up to also...and get real compliments once in awhile.
I may nvr be the idol u will look up to, coz i may nvr be good enough in that sense,
i always try my best, and i dont care how the rest of the world sees me,
as long as u didnt see me that way.
Tonite it seemed i was holding you back, and incapable of challenging you,
of pushing you to do better,
the last words u said b4 we went in search of other ppl,
did you feel discouraged with me?
And even though this may seem minor and unimportant,
but its as important as what u want for yourself..

Please dont patronise me by saying things that you dont mean.
Im a noob, i know.

Im sorry..just ramblings of someone who is tired.

Tuesday, February 9, 2010

2 more days before my longgg holss! Yes, found out today we're closing on this Friday and after that its 10days of slacking at home :) 10 days of doing absolutely nothing!! Yay!! :X

Downside is, dam alot of lose ends to finish up. Thank god im efficient enough and i can actually see the end of my list to do's. As mentioned, alot of suppliers calling up for payments, ppl wan go long holidayss lol. Havent really managed to sit down for a break these 2 days and i can actually foresee more stuff tomoro and the day after x.x Jy me!!!! *chants* i can do it~ i can do it~!

The empress seems to be treating me nice these 2 days...i wonder why..hmmm.. But at the end of the day, she was kinda in a foul mood, not at me , at the hubby haha...apparently he's been paying supplier and losing them bills..rofl..oh wells, its work entertainment eh? :p

Should be dam sleepy today , coz slept almost 4am last nite :X Yea yea, audied with babe ( lol, u really audi addict :p) and guess who we bumped into ?

Faifai!! Omg! Missed u la basket! :D

Actually didnt bumped into him, saw his name on the lobby list while waiting for babe to settle on a room .. ive been seeing him ard fr the past week but wasnt really sure if it was him. Somehow felt it hard to believe. And i got deleted from his bl =.= He says it was a bug, haha yea yea...who ask u mia 3yrs? Now we know there is a time limit to mia b4 everything poofs~ :D The only reason i pm'ed him was coz i saw him married O_O' Bth ler, needed to ask. And sure enough, u basket sia! He wanted to join us but was tipu'ing his cpl to go sleep..hahahah..poor fai :D Anyway did play with him in the end, and it was all laughs, sort of reminds me of how it used to be, just cant believe its been that long..

New patch for audi today, new songs, new stuff to buy..kind of thinking to get something nothing seems nice D: AND my windows mode is gone, though i can still minimize the game..hmm...still, it looks wide, like the time i went audi at Tbun. Guess i need some time for my eyes to adjust haha :S

Well, mum and sis are officially sick. Was gonna get some New Year groceries today but they couldnt get out of bed and i didnt knw what to get. Mum getting nervous though lol..its gonna be jam packed at the supermarkets tomoro for sure ><.
See! Its just....wideeee @__@;;

After so long using windows mode, my eyes need to expand its vision now :S (Ps abt the lousy shot, was playin and taking this pic at the same time lol..dont ask why i do it...just found it the time =.=)

Dead tired from work .. trying to pull myself and survive this week x.x *continues chanting* 2 more days...2 more days....

Think i had something else to post about, but getting incoherent somewhat :S

Time to continue my movie and some rest! Ciaoz~

P/s: Omfg..2 posts in one nite! Im so proud of meself :p

Monday, February 8, 2010

Penang is soooo freakingggg hotttttttttt ~w~

Im serious, even with the little bit of rain last saturday, i think it just made things worst. Im still feeling dam sick, with body aches and flu and now headache ><. And i lost my voice..again =.= result from sneezing the whole day ytd :(

Work has been crazy these cpl of days, partly coz its almost cny and alot of lose ends to clear up. Payments to be settled to suppliers b4 they go on their long break, projects to be tied up and handed over to owners..etc etc. I ended up going home almost 7plus. Dam tired. And brain dead.

Came home with bad headache still ringing. And slightly swollen o.o Quickly took a long long bath and went out to get dinner with sis. Missed compy again =.= Family gettin sick though, mum and sis to be exact. They've started coughing and sneezing last nite..My home is currently virus infested lols..and so close to new years :S

Seriously uninspired to write tonite. Nothing seems to be coming out. Maybe thats why im posting this the day after...LOL :X Really, really, really...writers block again. Or maybe im just too tired seeing that i was sick the entire weekend =.="

I really need to get some rest. I mean really rest.

P/s: This post was left hanging coz my "superman" jio'ed me almost 1am! Lol.. U hero la :D But u dont have to wake at 8 lor..still had fun though haha...ill leave that post for tomoro :)
Hello world on a Monday morning.. :)

Just woke up from my 1hr sleep and goin to bed again soon, am feeling sick today, been sneezing the whole afternoon away and even tried sleeping in the afternoon to clear it off but sadly the flu was abit too strong :(

Finally couldnt take it anymore and went in audi to play and forget abt it for did get better for a bit but was sneezing still nonetheless, to the point it was either hold my tissue or press the space bar =.= and laggy as hell for me tonite all of a sudden. Joined compy anyway, and managed to get into 2nd round then i started sneezing alot again. Got 4th for my best mode in compy, norm indi :( Sucks big time.

Im sneezing again as we speak. Sigh. The weather has finally gotten hold of me ><. Gonna head to bed i guess..feeling slightly feverish and body aches like crazy. Fingers were so tired while trying to press just now.

Sweet dreams and have a great week ahead guys :)

P/s: 6days to Chinese New Year and counting..


If only you didnt do what the one thing which would upset me,
The one thing i told you how i would feel if u did,
Everything else would not have mattered.
Whats the point of letting you know, if you were still gonna do it anyway?

But im still happy you finally told me what was wrong.

If only.

Sunday, February 7, 2010

Some piccy's up ~ :) And mum ask me to put here, "Still more to come.." Lol :X Thought she was already done, but she saw some houses in Lip Sin area which were way much cooler :p So, now she's hyped up to get more ..rofl :D

I still hope we dont turn out to have shopping mall decos once we're done D:

Currently home alone and having the flu again ><. Gonna go take a nap soon while watching some tv. Woke up extra early today, had bad dreams about work D:

Updates later~! :)

Saturday, February 6, 2010

Yo peoples ~! :) 'sup?

Lol..dont mind me, just finished rewatching Honey on dvd and their slang is kinda stuck in my head for the time being :p Currently home alone and kinda sleepy. Wanted to sleep earlier, but was staring at ceiling for the longest time. So decided to put on a movie, still wide awake =.=

Its been a damning hot saturday, just like any other day. Feeling irritable and moody but still control-able :) Didnt really do much 'cept for boring boring and extremely boring day at work. Thank god its only till 1 =.= I kept looking at the clock to see when it would be time to actually go home><. Even Fb has nothing for me anymore, my boredom and time waster companion..omigosh :(((~!

So decided to just hop ard in audi, watched babe play abit, mall abit(hands abit itchy....), "worked" abit...etc etc etc... Summary? Those 4 hours felt like 4years ><. Went home, lepak'ed ard audi again..then helped mum put up lights on the porch, audied somemore. But in the end, audi was not really a cool place to hang out today :( Decided to join random ppl again, played abit of 4k (did u believe i actually bullied? Must be my lucky day lol) then went in search of 8k.

Found a random room with random ppl who turned out to be not so random coz middle of game, one of them ask me if i remembered them. Rofl...i knw why its so easy to remember me..coz im cute..LOL! No la..its coz i NEVER changed my nick :D And that girl changed like xN times =.= Thank god i still remember her though :S

After exhausting myself with 140~ 8k songs (i realise i suck at really fast songs ><...not happy with my playin d..i wanna be idolised too D: ... though i did a 168 song fm! Im still cool! yay! :X *self consolation* T^T) wanted to try resting, and here i am, 10pm and still didnt sleep a wink =.= In fact joined compy, and was in 3rd till the last 20secs got ninja'ed >_>" I really need to work on my c3. Blah blah blah.

Thats abt my saturday gone..kinda not in the mood for alot of stuff, dono if its the heat or coz of this afternoon. Just moodless.

Oh wells, gonna go find another show to watch and prolly try to get some shut eye...but im almost levelling in cafe O_O;; okok, shall not be psychotic abt this @_@.

Loves~ Outta here~!

P/s : Still putting up new year lights O_O;; and we're not even done yet! Lol..:S Shall upload some pics later :)


And i may never know if that was the reason for the sudden mood change,

I dont know what it was that caused it, i just hope it wasnt that.

Whatever it is, im done trying to analyse everything,

even the hot and cold treatment im given at times.

All i can do is have faith :)

Friday, February 5, 2010

Hola hombres on a Friday~! :D

Gonna make this a short post, coz basically the 1st line has been there since about 11 and its already 2.30 =.= i needa go sleep soon ><.

Work was ok today, as usual, some hiccups here and there but then if there wasnt it wouldnt be normal eh? Ive been very guai today lor, didnt Fb as much, but it could be partially coz FB changed their layout and the new one sucks big time. Dam inaccessible and their so called 'user-friendly' is an understatement. Wonder what Fb will come out with tomoro since every single change frm FFS to the new layout has sucky =.=

Lousy new layout, even the bookmarks are hard to reach as its now at the home page =.= Oh wells..just hv to get use to it i guess..

Eyes hurt alot coz was practically staring at the darn excel workbook the whole day trying to figure out the costing that was left behind by ex colleague. Still havent figured it out though ><. Total sian-ness.

Kinda figured out a way to raise my pets, but its gonna take awhile i guess since ima poor owner TT^TT~ Might try to work it out this weekend ba :)

Like the pics i put up in my blog? Lol...i kinda dont like my own pic ><. Just trying and experimenting ba, shall take others these cpl of days :D Hopefully i dont look like shit :X With the heat and the lack of sleep, i really dont look so good =.= Someone pls force me to sleep more this weekend?

Gotta go to bed, another day tomoro..sigh. Oh well, cest la vie~

To you ( you knw who you are..)
I hope ur not still angry with urself or me over what happened this morning,
Seriously, its not even important,
I dont blame anyone if they dont read everything i have to say
coz some of it are really just rants that i need to get off my chest.
Of course im happy if u guys do,
it shows that ur really concerned abt what goes on in my life..

Thanks for bearing witness to my life :)


& and ur lost for the moment, frm my life.

Thursday, February 4, 2010

Horrid horrid headache ><.
Ive realised, for the past cpl of weeks, my posts have mainly been about the "job" and how much i "love" it here, the bosses, the workload, bla bla. Like a friend of mine said, "Hate it so much, then resign, if not then dont complain" Guess what? Im still gonna complain! Screw my friend! :X

Lol, just kidding la..not today folks :) Really feeling uncomfortable in this god forsaken weather. I just took a bath and now im sweating like hell again ><. Speaking of them would only make things worse =.= Basically had the 1st supposedly meeting of 2010 (like we had any in 2009) . Anyway, said it was a gonna be a new type of management..bla bla..yadda yadda..boring stuff.

And i think the whole point of the meeting was coz they wanted to implement the daily report of each staff. Like write down what we do each day and i absolutelyyy despise doing it. How can i even break down what i do in a day when it consists of so many little stuff? Maybe OM saw me playin fb ba lol..who knows. Is it my fault that u guys have no projects? What they dont know is hw good i am at writing grandfather stories, so expect a whole lotta crap on that fkin piece of paper. I wanted to voice out also, to not reprimand staff (me?) for work that was given last minute if its urgent. If u cant prioritise on whats impt, why shd i? But my head was givin me too much trouble and i might have just exploded and said wrong stuff. Bla.

Still cant stand ex colleague, so guai guai'ly agree to boss'es speech. Lets see hw long it will last :)

Hopefully i get some news on new jobs after CNY *prays hard* I really cant stand this place anymore, and how much bs they can say even when i already know they're knee high in horse shit =.=

Mum's been nagging me to come hm sharp coz its pointless to work extra for ppl who dont pay u ot on top of that dont even appreciate that u do and complain that its not enough. I guess its true bt i like to complete my stuff b4 i leave. Sigh dilemma.

Came home and fell asleep fr abit, head really throbbin man :( woke up , took a bath and now im all hot and sweating again zzzzzz!! But raised babe and 2 other of my pets earlier..i lost abt 1.2b frm there..ouch ><. How the hell am i suppose to raise them? Must think of another way .. Gonna head to bed, im sweating even more just by looking at the dam monitor >_>" Think im gonna go take another bath!!

Guten nacht!!

To my baby panda meimei
Im sorry we havent been talking much too,
Just one too many things coming at us at the same time
that we just feel to tired and sometimes out to words to say at times.
But im always here to listen, and will be here if u ever need me :)
Ur OCD sweetheart loves ya much much much too ~!


Have i told you lately that i love you?

Wednesday, February 3, 2010

I feel fever a-comin ><. Do i hear mc a-comin too? :x

Seriously, am having sudden head pains and feeling very warm & ears hurting :( The weather has been horrible since it turned Feb and it gettin hotter by the day. Had to take a bath 2ce just to cool down. And going out of the office in the afternoon and driving out is a horror! U cant imagine the oven im friggin bakin in :(

Dam mousey has been calling once too many times on my handphone, even when im in the dam office. I refuse to answer lol.. and also after working hours, its kinda getting irritatin when he calls after work hrs, justtt when i reach home and sit down to rest =.= Again, i refuse to answer. Im not obligated and most importantly, i dont give a fk >_>"

Oh ya, the 2 jambans were collected by OM..hahahaha :X She has the bigger car ok? Anyway, she was the one who offered, so there, la di da =.= I dont really care wht the impressions my bosses have, coz in their current position in the construction line, their names are not very famous with suppliers around. Shall not talk bad of them here, LOL :X, bt in summary, total hypocrites when it comes to payments.

And the empress had the cheek to tell me mousey complained abt something, which was not even my responsibility to begin with. In short, if the dam thing was so important, why the hell did he only remember abt it at 5pm when he needed it that night? I think i need to get him an organiser, that dude has some serious time management issues.

Busy day as usual, though at some points i was alone in office, so sneaked in audi lol :X Wanted to see hw it compared to home pc..connection dam cool la, pc not so haha :S I wonder why...must change to cabel d for mine..wireless sucks D:

Came home, audied abit, had dinner, audied abit more, totally forgot abt compy tonite until it was too late =.= Fb is not cool for me today, ffs came out with some screwed up new achievement caps and i am friggin nt happy abt it. Trying to up the value of some of my pets, bt want to find a way so i dont go totally friggin broke. Sorry guys, let me figure out how to work tis out coz apparently the value doesnt go up like it used to, which was 100m for each buy, now it skips like 300m per buy. Wtf? =.=

All this just made my headache worse :( Gonna go watch some movie and get some shut eye for tomoro.. and i thought it was Friday already! TT^TT!! Need to get ren's advise but he already gave me...i just need to decide hw i wanna do it...><.

Nighto peepos~ !
Spoke too soon!! =.=

As soon as i posted my last entry, sei mousy called and ask to print out a fkin 60pages business proposal =.= and 2 copies! zzzzzz and want it binded also! WTF?? It was already 5 d har, and the printer in our office is not young....takes abt 1/2 hr or more jz to print one bladi set...BAH BAH BAH!! And the dam binding machine is not working in our must take to shop and bind..walao.. i str8 told OM, i need go hm earlier d, let her tell bosses la, i dont really care, and though it seems she was genuinely concern abt my time (or maybe jia jia..who knows) ask me take her to the the end, i went home at 7 frm the friggin shop even with her there...oh fuckety fuck yay! =.=

Came home, played alone awhile and decided to join compy..kena trashed also dont care Normal fav ! :p coz i seem to chain alot in this mode rofl...and i got 2nd haha, all coz it was a slow song and i kept pressing the last key too which made me miss fm...2 times! =.=

Rd 1 - Normal Indi - 112bpm :)

2nd rd was CC4, some 120 song..and though i got 4th, im quite happy with my 4k tonite ahaha :X Played with random ppl after that, something which i havent done in awhile..anyway, hopped ard, then saw serene, yorke, nelson and platina, so joined them fr abit..well quite abit lol..test of faith and patience in playin 4k lolzz :S

Awhile later played with babe, bt attn span seriously gone down the drain..though im still pleased with my 4k and chains *gloatsss* :p Only for tonite ba...jz wanted loud music to blast my thoughts away.. Now there silence again, and my mind is wandering off..

Oh, noob me, was wondering wat the practice mode fr observers was...yuan lai by practising in the obs spot, can get dens de :O Cute right? :D

Lolzz..all because i accidentally press dao the arrows, if not i wouldnt knw also =.=

So, that was my nite of audi..seriously nvr play so much 4k in one determined to get better! >_>"" I still dont like it though...Lolol :S *kiasu-ism*

Off to bed peeps, back pain'ing d ><... Va mos! :)


Its still there, in my heart, on my mind, in my thoughts..
I cant seem to let it go, even if my heart tells me otherwise...
I cant trust it anymore..

Tuesday, February 2, 2010

Finally some break time .... @_@;

Busy busy busy Tuesday it has been and current status: momentarily happy :)

Net is safe and sound back with me coz genius me found another connection point..haiz..i cant stand my clever-ness sometimes :p Been running ard like a mad woman today, but the funniest point in the day, when i told my colleague this, we both just couldnt stop bladi laughing.. this is wat transpired..

Boss: Come here for awhile Mag.
Me: Yes Mr Loo?
Boss: Ok, the clients have confirmed these items, so u can issue PO's and collect the stuff from them.(ticks away on the items..and hands to me)
Me: Oh, ok
Boss: Tell them u will go and collect later.
Me: *stares at the list* Me? Collect? They're 2 Wc's here o.o; ( TOILET BOWLS! SITTING ONES!) Erm...
Boss: I think car can take...
Me: I dont think MY car can.... (=.="") anyway, they can deliver, ive asked b4..
Boss: Oh, then ask them to deliver by today.
Me: Ok... (kns >_>"")

Ok, this might not seem funny didnt seem funny at the time too, but when i got back to my table, i jz stared at my colleague and told him, "Boss wan me to collect 2 jambans and 1 basin O_O;;" and he just laughed out and i started too. Omg it was just too fking hillarious. Wtf, he thinks i drive a friggin lorry? My God, how idiotic can a person get? And i call him my boss? Christ sakes... WHATEVER! =.="

Last nite was extremely pooped, my arms were practically dangling from the sides ><.. I hope we're done cleaning..pls pls pls pls TT^TT~ I know we still have lights to put up and mum got one cool lantern when she went out ytd, and she got it cheap coz it was only 1 and not a pair lol..bro asked, not one pair how to hang? :o Mum say "Hang in center" Rofl! Well, she has a point..i actually thought of same thing..:X AND! One thing good abt spring cleaning...we find alot of lost treasures :p

Isnt my kb much more cuter nao?? Lololol :X

Blah, wanted to stick those long time ago, but donwan to buy coz i knw sis got one extra :p I wonder how long i can tahan with it though..kinda too cute lol :S

Ok, back to the tedious work of comparing paint colors..><. Ima model employee ok? One that blogs, plays cafe world, robot wars and ffs during working hours....LOL! Bah!

Toodles!! :D

P/s: Hope nothing happens in an hr frm now to spoil my momentary burst of happy hyperness x.x
I am lost..

I really feel like giving up..
Coz nothing is ever what it seems.

Fate had a hand in this, and it has a great sense of humour in screwing with ppl's lives..

Maybe its becoming a bore to you,
But i really cant be bothered anymore..

Im tired of it all.


Its been a long nite, and no one seems to be online, esp when i need someone to talk to. Guess its ironic that way :)

Just finish clearing room short while ago, and thought of watching Supernatural, but cant le..almost 2 am ><. Time to rest for another day at war tomoro.

Fk work =\

Monday, February 1, 2010

Happy Monday people~~!! And what a wonderful Monday it has been....NOT =.=

As if its not bad enough that its a Monday, plus the fact that a majority of my friends are not working (replacement for Thaipusam on Sat), i had to come to office and find out that my ex colleague (the one that macho'ly resigned) came back to work today. Lol? Mr. Im too cool to work here, ill do my work my way and after i leave here, what jobs i have in line is private confidential? Wrong move man =.=

Ex colleague who was fired, was also an ex staff here and they called her back to work for them. My opinion, once u leave and if they ask u to come back and u do, u lose out on respect from them. Not that they do give any. Bahs! And im sitting at where he used to sit, coz basically the phones are juz beside me, and last time, when the phone rang, Mr. my hands are to heavy to pick the phone, would make me walk all the way to his place jz to answer the bladi phone. Double bahs.

In summary, work sucks today. And its not that i have anything against him, jz cant stand the smug look just coz bosses ask him to come back. In my head im thinking, "What a loser, mr no balls =.="

And he's after my net line again. Sheesh. Must get him to request for his own. Dam ma fan for me, imagine 2ppl sharing one cable >_>""

Ive suddenly thought of nicknames for the bosses, i shall call the husband "mousey" coz his dam fugly moustache that makes him look like a mouse :x and the wife "empress" LOLOLOL :X Who ask them to piss me off 1st, and even had me do delivery of payments to suppliers =.= Like b4 i left for work, was suppose to drop off a chk fr a supplier, bt boss say want to go, ask me to prepare work orders urgently (bear in mind, already 6pm) then in the ask me to go anyway zzzz..and on top of that, ask me to send the door maker back to the office, like wtf? I already finish work and its not even on the way =.= The dude said mousey ask me to call him, i jz said, no need call d la, for what? Frankly i dont even care if he told my boss, coz my boss can go fk himself. Manipulative asses.

Just a dam tiring day, running fkin errands like some kind of office boy, and everywhere is so jam and freakin hot nowadays. Wanted to find someone to talk to, but sigh, guess u were busy too :(

Came home with mum doing spring cleaning *silent screams* CNY cleaning... ><. Guess my day is not over yet :( Luckily they went out to get wants to compete with neighbour..My God, i hope we dont end up looking with CNY shopping mall type deco =.=""

Oh ya, Case 39? Not bad movie :) Scary in a sense, bt not scary to the effect i only see my hands on front of my face type lol. Meaning, still ok, even for scaredy cats like me :x But then devil incarnate little girls are dam screwed up'ly ><.

I wanna go rest, but mum is on the way back with lights...i wonder if i can weasel my way out of this...sleepy x.x

And i woke up with a swollen lower lip today!! Tmd..must be insect bite :((


& just when i thought it was healing..